Haunted Houses

I don't like them. That pretty much covers that. Well, maybe I should elaborate somewhat. I don't like crowds, I don't like ghosts, and I don't like wildaghouls or wookalars. I'm not afraid of the dark I am afraid of what is in the dark. Supposedly there is nothing in the dark that isn't there in the light, but the important difference is that in the light I can see it coming. See when I hear something in the light I can look over and see if it is about to eat me and then I have the opportunity to decide if I am going to let it eat me or protest. In the dark my choices are limited. If I hear something in the dark the probability of protest is limited to whatever time it takes for me to start running tripping over something else I can't see and rendering myself unconscious or as things in the dark call it "tasty". Of course I also firmly believe that evil will find you soon enough without any help from you. Now I am an avid hunter and being that is the case I am often in the woods before light arrives and after light goes to sleep. I know I should be a bit uneasy and sometimes I am. Every hunter has been from time to time. If they say they have not they are what things in the dark call "big fat stinking tasty liars." See for those of you that do not hunt there is a very interesting phenomenon that occurs when you can't see. The volume control of your hearing triples and a squirrel running through the woods sounds like..........well....... a wildaghoul. It is funny sometimes before light breaks when you hear something moving through the leaves and it can only be Bigfoot or an escaped axe murderer and then dawn breaks and it is a squirrel, not even a big squirrel or an armadillo. Nothing sounds more like an entire panzer division invading your hunting blind than a medium sized totally oblivious to your presence armadillo. Oh well, have to get to bed. Going hunting tomorrow morning.