I Wonder

I wonder how they handle handicapped parking at the special olympics? Do they just stack hundreds of cars one on top of the other in those couple of spots right near the stadium entrance.

Theoretical Downhill Crap Running

I have been watching a discussion on the grocery tax this morning and reading some opinions and have discovered that I am against repealing the grocery tax. If you have no clue what I am speaking of please let me explain.......no there is too much....let me sum up. The winning candidate for Governor this year plans to repeal Arkansas' grocery tax. It is the six percent state tax that every Arkansan pays at the grocery store before local taxes are added and so on and so on. Let me explain my position which has a few valid points. Number One: Your grocery bill will not be smaller. How is this possible you say? Do you think that Wal-Mart, Hoggly Woggly, or anyone else is going to pass the chance to increase grocery prices five to six percent without you noticing. I doubt it. Number Two: It is the only fair tax in the world. Rich pay the same, poor pay the same, everybody pays the same amount. Please tell me if you can think of another tax that no matter how much or little you make everyone pays the same amount. It's fair. Number Three: Where is the revenue the state gets from groceries going to come from now? We currently have a budget surplus in our state and our soon to be new Governor seems to think that it will last forever,WRONG!!! In a year or so when the price of your hunting and or fishing license goes up and the price of state permits for land leases and personal property taxes increase and you notice that suddenly you are not getting any money back from the state at tax time anymore call me and I will come to your house and personally tell you I told you so. Number Four: You will lose money in the long run. When there is no revenue to fix roads you can't dodge every pothole so you buy tires which includes a fee that you are charged by the retailer to dispose of the tires (which comes from the state charging them for the luxury of taking your worn out tires), that fee will increase. The state gives grants to rural communities for fire departments, those grants will decrease less rural fire departments will be established and insurance rates that have been on the decline because of the creation of fire departments closer to rural residents will begin to increase again, and so on and so forth. Folks, crap runs downhill and if you haven't noticed lately you the consumer are not only at the bottom of that hill but you are in a open hole at the bottom of that hill. Get ready the crap is going to be joining you in the hole very soon.

The New Year

Well the New Year is upon us and I eagerly await the number one New Years Eve pastime in the south. Randomly launching all manners of ammunition into the sky at precisely midnight. Yes if you are reading this and you are not from the area let me explain. In the south there is a long held tradition of mixing large amount of alcohol and large amounts of ammunition as if one without the other was not dangerous enough. Men and women of the south enjoy becoming increasingly intoxicated as the evening goes by and then at the stroke of midnight firing all manners of weaponry straight up into the air. There is just one problem with such indiscriminate launching of lead. GRAVITY!!! Yes even in the south what goes up must come down. Southerners have discovered ways around many of sciences proven theories including but not limited to, marrying your cousin is bad, welfare is only for people who can’t work, and alcohol is for special occasions. But, not yet have southerners been able to avoid gravity. So, if you out and about tonight and you notice the witching hour approaching, take cover in your specially designed aerial attack bunker and turn off all magnetic fields, and hope the New Year passes you by and lands in the dirt a safe distance from you.

The Greatest Show on Earth

What could it be you ask. It's the one the only Robot Chicken. Bock Bock Bocky Bocky Bock Bock Bock. Thats right Comedy Central's irreverant look at the lives and times of stars, historical figures and regular folks through the magic of claymation, action figures, and official star memoribilia. I highly recommend that you tune in as often as possible and prepare for all the free laughs you can handle. Of course there are many wonderful programs available during the Adult Swim section of the programming but I must say cutting edge entertainment has not been so expertly done since In Living Color. Tune in and laugh and if you don't laugh, be sure to watch Mind of Mencia to learn the definition of DE..DE..DE.

This Has Become A Thing

Ok. This has now become a thing. In the midst of mopping and squeeg........squegee....(long pause) "mopping" I have discovered that the apartment is a total wreck and have undertaken my spring cleaning "a wee might early"( said in best lepre........leprek....... "little guy with pot of gold" voice). This place is a holy mess and i'm not takin it any more. So, upon futher reflection I have decided that God was telling me to clean the place up. was hoping for the boat angle....but I think more likely it is time to put spic and span to work, suck up the luxurious awesome orange fumes and get it done. It's not like I will need alot, cleaner....check....mop......check.....sq......mop.....check.........water oh hell yeah got water. Stay tuned ladies and gents, this may get interesting.

It's Raining

Yes I know the title states the obvious if you are anywhere near me but let me explain further. It is raining..........In my freaking apartment!!!! Yes ladies and gentleman I am blessed with the indoor swimming pool I have always wanted. For the last five hours I have been mopping and squeegeing.......Squegeying...squeegyi....oh the hell with it using one of those long rubber scraper thingys to push water out of the apartment and into the street. It started I suppose while I was fast asleep with princess Nyquil and continued into the morning until I awoke from my angelic slumber and noticed a dog bed floating down the hallway. So now I sit here with the heat turned up to 8th circle of hell, and the windows fogging up from the inside pondering what it is that God is trying to tell me. And, alas I have figured it out......he wants me to by a boat. That has to be it don't you think? Not a big boat mind you something nice and small....affordable and not flashy. That's what it is... I have to get a boat forthwith.......at least as soon as I finish mopping and sqeegei......squegyi.......oh screw it you get the point.

Not So Foggy Today....

Well I must say that today has been a pretty good day. In fact the last couple of days have been decent. Even though I am feeling apprehensive about starting a new job on Monday, I would like to say thanks to the "G"meister for perking me up. Props to the old man for the wonderful sinus tabs, and peace out to everyone else. Now about the new job. I recently resigned my position in the bowels of hell to attempt to make a better life for myself. In the meantime I worked at my mom and dads store for some coinage and to stay fed during my brief layoff. Problem is now that I have worked at the store again I realize how much I enjoy it. I've laughed more than usual. Mom Dad, and the Sarge are usually good for a couple of belly laughs an hour, we keep each other rolling. Still not getting out of the apartment except to walk next door to the store, but hey it's something. I have also noticed something lately, I have begun to pace. Yes pace. I don't understand it, can't figure it out but lord I pace constantly. It's amazing that I don't sleep I have nightmares every night and yet I have the energy to pace all day long. I have discovered that with enough nyquil you don't stay awake long after the nightmares so that helps somewhat. I see that Saddam Hussein will be executed at any moment, should make for great television. I guess this will be taken by Fox News and be called a success for the Bush administration. Seems like a success story for whoever weaves the ropes over there and that's about it. I wonder if Bush puts on tights and a cape at night and pretends to fly around the White House defeating tyrrany with a magic wand made from the solidified ignorance of Donald Rumsfeld. Who knows ...but I would like to be a fly on the wall in that house tonight. I bet he runs in to the Presidential bedroom tonight wearing a pink thong carrying a martini smacks Laura on the ass and says "baby how about wearing the really red lipstick tonight." Oh my, what a thought.

Why???

I don't understand, I really don't. What have I done to deserve the hell that my life has become. I call myself a good person, who knows if i really am. I treat women well so I have been told. What has brought me to where I am. I still find myself making decisions based on the actions of my past. It seems to be an endless loop from which I am unable to escape. I try to move past the decisions I have made and continue with my life but I believe now that to be impossible. So I am reserved to re-live everything I have done in horrible nightmares on a nightly basis. People wonder why I am awake at all hours of the night. Well there you go. So if you find posts at strange hours you understand. More to come...please stand by.

No matter where I go there I am.

Have you ever wondered what it was like to hate to go outside. To like the world inside your apartment better than the world outside. well, let me tell you now that it is no picnic. Other than work I leave the apartment once a week maybe and the entire time that I am out I feel like at any moment something dreadful is going to happen. I used to love going out, but not anymore. I don't know anyone anymore. I'm not even sure that I know who I am anymore. I used to talk to many people and be right in the middle of whatever was going on and now I may talk to two people all week. I want to be more outgoing, to be like I once was but I cannot force myself to be comfortable. I'm not sure what to do or what it will take to find who I used to be. I am too afraid to go out and look for myself. If anyone finds me out there somewhere, leave me on the porch and knock twice on the door.

My Mind Wanders

I recieved a phone call tonight. I must say that I was in the middle of the worst volley of self loathing in recent history, when the phone rang and a familiar voice wished me Merry Christmas. It was a voice that I had not heard in two years and suddenly briefly the fog lifted. It is amazing how when your world seems to be clouded in eternal darkness one voice can reach through and pull you into the light. If you are reading this...(and I hope you do) thank you. You will never know what you have done for me.

Off to the Races

Well now I guess I should explain the name purpose and overall content that can be expected. Anything goes. That pretty much covers it. My day, my life, my opinions, all will be subject to the scrutiny of you the reading public. Political, religious, local, and national. Also trials of love, lust and loathing. 2007 is mine. This is going to be an interesting ride. Just hold on tight.

YOU ASKED FOR IT

Well many people have asked me why I quit blogging oh so many years ago and I never have been able to give them a good answer. So, I seems time to start where I left off and see how things go.